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Farewell Journal~ [27 Sep 2007|11:10pm]
. . MOVED TO: zaijian . .
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Review: DBSK - Lovin' You Single [12 Jun 2007|07:05pm]
[ mood | blank ]

My post today would've been a recap on my day, but since I'm drawing blanks and can't - for the life of me - remember exactly what's been said or done, I figure that it'll come to me later. But, for now, since I'm already here... I might as well get to doing something. Since I'm on this total music review kick on everything I've been listening to lately, I thought that since DBSK's just released - hey, why not. I did one for FT Island, even though they aren't my favorite, so I decided on doing a review for a group that actually is my favorite.

All right. So, here we go.

Review: DBSK - Lovin' You SingleCollapse )


I guess I should make a regular post sometime soon though, for my mind's sake.

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Review: FT ISLAND [09 Jun 2007|01:07pm]
[ mood | excited ]

All right. I've always wanted to do a review about something, but I've never had enough willpower in me to do so. But I think, from now on, I will try my best to make reviews from an observer's viewpoint. And to be completely honest, if not bluntly honest, in my thoughts and opinions. I can understand that people will become offended - but I'd rather be real than a liar. So, without further ado, onto my FIRST review on this new band called FT Island.

These guys are great, even though they're a few years younger. I wouldn't exactly call myself a fan just yet... or if ever. But they're new and I thought it wouldn't hurt to try them out. This review took me over 4 hours to make, but I think it's quite worth it in the end.

. . Cheerful Sensibility . .Collapse )

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why don't you just c u t me open. . . (?) [05 Jun 2007|09:38am]
[ mood | panic! ]

I'm in class.

And dear lord Jeezush, I'm trying SO hard not to hurl. Currently, thanks to the cynical decisions made by my teacher, we're watching a graphic movie on a Cesarean Delivery gone wrong.

So far, the doctor's have already gotten the E.T. (the alien, not the celebrity-based television channel -__-) deformed baby out ... (much as I want to avoid saying this, but -- it looks like an overgrown raisin. o__O Holy.) And the lady's bladder popped out, much to the doctor's surprise. (No shit. I'd be surprised, too!) It's even hanging out and leaking... fluids. Now they're having trouble finding the uterus but will staple everything shut.

That -- can't be good.

Update later, but up next!

A surgical procedure being done on a man's penis.


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your face makes me wanna B R E A K somethin' [04 Jun 2007|12:47pm]
[ mood | annoyed ]

I just want to say one thing.

I finally understand why we have tailgaters. You know. Those annoying sons-of-bitches whose front bumper always seems to kiss the ass of your own car? The ones that drive SO close - you could practically see their face in your rear-view mirror? Yeah, them.

Well, here, in the sun-shiny part of Southern California ... drivers either go too fast or too slow, in my opinion.

I'm already driving at about 50 miles per hour, but those speedfucks always feel the need to push on the gas, change lanes, and then CUT me off when I was about to make a turn. And this isn't even on the damn freeway!!! Slow down. Because, trust me, wherever you're going isn't that important. And even if it is - then guess what? ... It'll STILL be there.

At this point, I don't CARE how that sounds. I just care about looking after the safety of my own ass.


And then there's the driver's who go tooooooooooo slow. They're usually senior citizens who're too bull-headed to just LET GO of their driver's license. But if they're old, I'll give them their respect since in a few more years, the only shred of independance they'll have left is the ability to make it to the bathroom without "spilling". Mean, I know, but I'll be the same damn way if I make it long enough to get dentures.

Now to those who are young and can see the road clearly, and aren't blinded by the sun...?

Either fill your tank with more gas, or get off the road. 'Cause God forbid we drive faster than 20 miles per hour!

Okay, I think that's enough for ranting. Just wanted to get that much out of my system.


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when the pieces fall together [03 Jun 2007|02:32pm]
[ mood | content ]

Okay. Here's just a re-cap of my past week, hopefully, in single-paragraph form.

After spending a weekend with a swollen foot from an infection I got after stepping on an old rusty needle -- (way to go, Mom) -- I pretty much realized something. Memorial's Weekend was a complete and total bust, and I just prayed that things got better along the way.

Memorial's Day. Lurked inside nursing my wounds, and made a few complaints to the neighbors who have an ungodly urge to slam the door whenever they close it. Why? I don't know. But I've heard them fight a few times (do we have thin walls, or what?) about nonsense like, "YOU ATE THE LAST CHEETO" ... What's with the obsession with cheetos? They're salty and aren't the least bit appetizing, and they leave an orange powder on your fingers making you look like a permanent five-year-old in finger-paint. Now is that attractive? I. Think. Not.

Oh, this is lovely. After eating some fried fishballs (don't ask. I was hungry, okay?!) -- my stomach started feeling funny. Not ha-ha funny, but, weird and rumbly. Before I had the chance to freak out over the possibilities of me having an alien in my stomach (that'd be pretty cool, now that I think about it.) ... I ended up hurling everything I ever ate into the sink. Yes. The sink. I didn't even have a moment's notice before whirling around and up-chucking my lunch AND breakfast into a dish-filled sink. Sorry Mom.

And if that wasn't good enough, after a good three hours of puking and vomitting liquid and God-KNOWS-what -- I ended up having the runs. If you know what I mean. Huhuhu. Not fun, at all. But that sucks, you know? After all that struggling with my first problem, I have to deal with it again but this time out the other end?! Christ. -__-

Didn't do much, really. I just tried to recollect myself and find my balance without getting all sick again. Thursday - had to help out at Church with a bunch of homeless people. Key word? Gloves and a shitload of disinfectant. That is all.

This was our day. Just like every other day of the week. HA!


I'm not racist. I'm not out to purposely look down upon anyone's cultural background or ethnicity, but -- there's something that I HAAAATE about a particular race. Okay, so living in California has more cons than pros, in MY opinion. One of them is the close proximity of every apartment since they're practically squished, side-by-side.

Okay. So there was this birthday celebration going on last night. Great, that's wonderful, congrats for surviving another year in this hellhole! But do you honestly have to blast your inane music at FULL volume? Your AYAYAYAYA'S and AAARRRIIIIIBBAA's are NOT appreciated past 10 O'clock at night! >__< *FISTSHAKE* -- Either rent a space away from the neighborhood or re-jump the border if you have to, just STOP disturbing the peace that's needed for others to sleep. My WHOLE night was ruined listening to that sombrero shit our neighbor was blasting.

But my Mom called the police, and around 2 AM -- there was peace once again. Because of that, if she wasn't my Mother -- I'd marry her. But then... EW!

>] Take that.

Finally, the end of the week - and onto the start of a new one. Shit. The second most scariest thing I've ever seen up to date in my 20 years of life... is to watch an 8 month pregnant lady run. Not to mention, she's my Pastor's wife. I guess reading the Bible isn't the only thing they have in common. x] Huuuu. But good Lord, I hope that baby doesn't turn out having brain damage.

Overall, I think this week was only good because I have someone to keep me sane. And I can't be grateful enough. So thanks for putting up with my grumpiness and ongoing rants that make no sense. And thanks for just seeing me through it all. You're what I call a best friend and more...

Until you crack. x] <3

Note to self: Finish portfolio and complete Surgery Guidelines before June 20th.

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& girls just wanna have fun~ [26 May 2007|01:11am]
[ mood | happy ]

Well, I've got GOOD news.


That was the grade for my overall final. We took the test in two parts, so it wouldn't be too much of a hassle. With words to break down like like bradycardial or cholecystectomy (which would - in hypothetical terms - later result in an hysterectomy. And those were only the VERY easy ones, to name a few) was pretty much how it went. But, I'm happy! I passed. Now it's on to the harder steps. I hope I don't get queasy along the way due to bundled up nerves all twisted up inside. >__< A panic attack is the last thing I need. I don't know why I get so warped up around Finals. Well... that should have been a no-brainer. But, still. I need to learn how to loosen up or something, otherwise, I might suffer a stroke by the time I'm 40. Won't be too long 'till then, will it? Anyway...

I hate my Teacher. Hate her, but love her - I can't decide which outweighs the other. But that sadistic old bat must LOOOVE to torture us with unrrated films of recorded surgeries. On Thursday, right after our test, she pulls out a video and says that she has a great treat for all of us. Here we are - dumb as fducks, I tell you - thinking that we're gonna have the rest of the class to chill and relax after that final. Boy, we were shit wrong. So she pops in the tape, humming cheerfully while tapping her newly manicured nails together, reassuring us that we'd have so much FUN watching this one. Yeah. Okay.

Next thing we know, we see a some guy - someone who works on the telephone poles - being rolled into the emergency room to get operated on. So this dude, we figured, probably injured himself falling down. Like a busted skull or a beat-up spine, or something. Sounded right, didn't it? WRONG. Wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong! Turns out that he did fall, all right. But the way he landed was a bit... off. Somehow, on the way down, he had hit a branch and - a stick from the branch had broken off along with his fall. That same stick managed to burst through the poor man's pants, stuffing itself like a thick, throbbing ... *cockff* ... RIGHT into the guy's anus. Perfect shot. (My teacher just HAD to yell out: "Bullseye!!! Heheheheee!" as they played a re-enactment of his fall)

Not only that - but the branch pushed past his rectum and right between his internal organs, narrowly missing them. And I mean narrowly. Doctors had to operate him by cutting open his stomach, and rummaging around to find the branch. Apparantly, that damn oversized twig was a liiiittle more than two inches away from puncturing his heart. Right about now, I can figure that the guy is not only grateful for surviving - but I bet you, with everything that I own (not that I own much, anyway), that he's also straight. 'Cause after an experience like that ... WOOO. I doubt the last thing he'd want to say is, "Harder!" x__X I think. Unless he's, you know, into that sort of thing. Freak.

I also got my CPR Card today.

The class was brilliant. Our Instructor, Mark, was absolutely hilarious. He made learning CPR fun to do - and frankly - for a three hour class, it was worth every penny. (It was only 30 bucks. HAH.) So, I walked into the class. There were two adult dummies and two infant dummies, with airbags sitting beside them, on the table. I took my seat and started playing with the tubes, and even inserted one into the baby dummy's mouth. Next thing I knew - I turn around and find a wild-haired white man, with nose hairs and crooked teeth smiling down at me like some newly released mental patient. After staring at me intently for a few, stretched-out awkward moments, he chuckled (and when he did that - his nose hairs wiggled. o_O) and called me a baby-killer. So after a second of deciding whether or not I should be offended, he reached over and yanked out the tube ... then used it to wave around like some magic wand.

And for some bizarre reason - the whole class quieted down, and he introduced himself as being the Instructor for the afternoon.

I turned out to be his assistant for the entire day. Worked out in the end, 'cause I got my card - and that's one more less thing to worry about. I can't remember all details from the top of my head (except for the nose-hair wiggling.) ... but when I do, I'll make sure to update again.

And now~

Onto Memorial Day's Weekend!

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try. again. [17 May 2007|01:02pm]
[ mood | amused ]

Boy - do I have a doozey of an update.

So, there's this annual blood drive going on at my school. And for some bizarre reason that is beyond my knowledge - I find myself volunteering to take papers and give surveys. Just general questions, you know? If they smoked, if they drank (and how many times), family history of complications pertaining to blood, what they had to eat this morning (not that I cared or anything. food is food.), if they've been outside the country in the last year (since, apparently, there are just some places you can't go to! like Mexico ... *dies*) - pretty easy stuff. Plus... it got me out of class, so regardless, I was all for it!

The nurses did their thing on the other side of the room - while I watched every victim shuffle their way into the little cubicles to be laid down. It was like watching an animal get their yearly shot, for the most part. Others ... just looked like an animal getting shot down. Why sign up for this anyway if you have a phobia of needles, is what I wanna know. I think getting over your fears should come gradually. Not on the spot where everyone can see you - unless you're on Fear Factor, and in that case, you're just setting yourself up for failure in MY opinion. But if you like the whole do-or-die thrill thing... then be my guest. Just don't overstay your welcome, damn bum.


This skinny 97 lbs stick came in shaking so much, I swear I could hear her bones rattling. Her eyes were darting around like she was on speed - and she kept making this annoying chattering noise with her teeth. I was SO close to just showing her the door, when the nurse told me that she was the right weight and had no signs of anemia. What - are you kidding me? This chick was on the verge of a TOTAL meltdown and looked like you could see a pea go down her stomach if she swallowed one. And they wanted to take her blood? With what?! -- A straw?! Well anyway, if I couldn't kick her out, might as well break out the popcorn and watch.

The second they even BROUGHT a needle close to her skin - she literally fell. From the bed, to floor - just fell. While everyone tried to get her back onto the bed ... I was just wondering if she broke a bone. That was a pretty nasty fall for a drama queen, just so you know. And if that wasn't bad enough - she started crying. I mean, the WORKS. Boo-hoo'ing and wailing for her Mother, who probably shipped her out've their home in Malibu to begin with, and just had a complete breakdown. So, they tried for a second time - once they got her approval and she was "all better" - what boggles me the most is why on God's green earth would they even believe her?! Because the minute she even saw the damn needle - she fuh-reeaaakked!!! (freaked. yeah? trying to mix it up a bit. <.<)

Oh, and this is the beautiful part.

It wasn't even the needle to withdraw a pint of blood. You know - the four-inch one? It was the needle used to check if her blood level was acceptable. That itty-bitty one that pricks your finger, and only little kids freak out over if they see it. So, forgive me. But I can't be the least bit sympathetic over something that small and trivial. Especially when the whole ordeal was made into some over-the-top finale to a daytime soap opera. Stupid, but amusing overall. She ended up not giving blood (surpriiise) but atleast she got a sticker for trying.

When you really think about it - it's all psychological. The human heart pumps gallons upon gallons of blood everyday ... what's one little pint gonna hurt? I'd give blood, but I've got a type of hemolytic anemia. They wouldn't want my blood even if I had money floating out've my crack. But anyway, sure, you might feel a little dizzy or light-headed (Did I mention that another girl in my class almost passed out after giving blood? All her fault. She moved around too much, too soon. =_=;) but food and drinks are given at the end. Not some cheap two-cent cookies found under some homeless guy's torn up newspaper, either. Waffles and fruit juice, and candy were distributed with some CD's and pins saying: "I gave blood!" or "I save lives."

Which, to me, was still kinda cheap 'cause if you drop it ... the whole thing falls apart. What a cheat, huh?

Anyway, I've learned that whenever a person has fainted or is about to faint, it's best to lift their feet onto a chair so their blood could circulate properly and return color to their skin again. And don't give them water, because then it'll cause an imbalance and, unless you enjoy the smell and stench that comes with vomit, they'll barf everywhere. I just thought that was interesting.

Uh, dealing with rude attitudes and random dizzy-spells aside ... it wasn't such a bad experience. The lead nurse we had was a sweet lady that always had a wise-crack or two to say. So, needless to say, it was pretty fun.

And my teacher has such sick stories that she always feels the need to share. After being in the Medical field for over 20 years, I can't exactly say I'd blame her. I'm starting to believe she's some sort of twisted sadist. o_O Just a thought. Today, she told us of how she saw some poor man who had a deteriorating lung from lung cancer (obviously) die on the parking lot, after recieving some sort of laser treatment. Apparently, the laser went too far in and burst a vein somewhere near his heart which caused blood to spill out from EVERY orifice of his body. His ears, eyes, mouth, nose, penis and rectum were literally spilling blood. The firemen nearby who were called had to shut down three important streets because the blood had spread down onto the concrete, since the place where he had fallen was at a slant. The guy died at the end, and what's even worse, was that his own family didn't even know that he had cancer in the first place. Must've been really sad once they found out.

Well, as I've said. This was one doozey of a post ... and I'll probably get bored if I tried reading it, too. But, yeah, this was my day. And it'll be back to studying again soon.


I can't wait 'till tonight.

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brushin' off the dust [15 May 2007|10:50pm]
[ mood | full ]


It's been awhile, hasn't it? Changed the layout. Again. And I thought it would be a good idea since it features the only man I'll truly love and respect, even moreso as a Muse. Cheesey, I know. But atleast I've got a damn good reason to change my layout. It's cute. Simple. I like it. Anyways ... ahhh, I can't help it. The guy's more active in my brain than my brain itself. It's - kinda scary sometimes. I'll walk into a music store with intentions of ONLY browsing around, and maybe peek at a few indie bands. But after I leave the store and look in my bag - I come to find that I've bought some Rap or HipHop CD (yes, CD. bite me, IPOD lovers.) without even realizing it. And I don't even like HipHop ... and I despise the majority of Rap music these days. (This is why I'm Hot? - No. Air Conditioner, you twat.) But he loves it, and I can't exactly, for the life of me - figure out why. So, I just stopped trying. Other Muses also reside in my brain, as well. But you guys know that feeling.

I'm tired.

School has tuckered me out. All this reading and writing, and researching. Not to mention - I have to pay for CPR classes which range from $30 - $50 dollars. Apparently, it's a requirement for my class. Otherwise ... I won't be able to graduate. (GASP!) But given my tight budget for this month, it's a hard decision between eating ... or starving for the next two weeks to get the money. Hmmm. Yep, I opt for brain surgery at this point. Not to mention, the books that I need to buy for my Nationwide Exam will cost close to TWO HUNDRED dollars. $200! Just where am I going to get all that cash?! I can't get a job yet either, because I need to finish this course first. So - I'm pretty much stuck in a predicament here.


Um, yeah. Sleep. Now. I feel my body functions slowing down. Especially my main ability to have everything I say make sense.

I'll update later.

It's not over yet, kiddies. >:]

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... in with the new [05 Apr 2007|11:46pm]
[ mood | brand new start ]

That rant you saw, if you people were able to catch in the first place - remember that? If you're wondering where it went, then I'll tell ya. No, I didn't delete it in fear that I needed save my own ass. I put it under private-lock so that only my eyes could see it. Looking back on it now, I realize why they call such entries 'rants'. Rants are basically made from spur-of-the-moment steam that needed to be released. And since that's what journals are for, I did decide to make the post. No regrets about it, either. I can see why I made it as well -- and since I understand, maybe it's time to explain why I understand.

I don't like to be duped or played like I'm some kind of a fool. I think I atleast a deserve a head's up, or a warning on what's going on. Because -- ooh, surprise! -- I do give a rat's ass. And for more than just my request, if that wasn't already known. Even though it should have been. And though I wish things didn't turn out the way they did -- guess what. They did. There's nothing any of us could do about it, either. But to just put it behind us and whatever. I got what I needed in the end, anyway. Okay. Not going to concentrate on anything petty and just be grateful that someone did come to the 'rescue' and helped out with something that I do consider important to me. Letting it go now and making more breathing space.

So, yay.

I've been studying like a maniac these past few weeks. Tests have been coming so frequently lately that I find myself forgetting what chapter I'm on, or what information I need to work on memorizing. I guess this will all prepare me for the huuuge State Exam coming up around September. Now, think about it. It's only -- what. April? And here I am, already freaking out about some test that'll take place in a few months. I don't think I'd worry this much if it weren't for the fact that the test costs (get this) THREE HUNDRED bucks to take. And if you fail it the first time, well, sucks for you! Yeah. I like how that system works. (/Sarcasm)

Oh, and I can't believe the pile of books I need to buy after Spring Break Ends. Did I mention? Yeah~ I'm on Spring Break. And you know what I'm going to do..?


And then study some more because my dear, dear, teacher took the liberty of providing us with seven day's worth of work to do over this short holiday. Lovely, no?

Now... about those books. 70 bucks for my second set, not to mention the medical crap that'll be needed on the side. I'm atleast expecting to rake up a nice debt of over 52465754210054 dollars. Okay. I'm exaggerating -- but still. That's a LOT of money. And it doesn't help that I'm poor at the moment. Speaking of poor -- I was supposed to go out tonight with a bunch of my classmates, because three of them are having birthday's within the month. But I unfortunately had to decline because of previous agreements. Plus! I have no money. Oh, well. I hope things don't get too out of hand especially since this one chick I know is going... and she can get pretty crazy. Maybe I'll give them a few calls sometime this week to check if they're still alive or not.

Other than school, I've pretty much kept my usual routine. And the-nameless-one still knows the deal. Yeah? *Heart*

Anyways~ I need to finish something that I promised to do. I won't flake out.

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